Mo ti ri ododo kan,
(I’ve seen a beautiful flower)
Ibadi Aran, adumaradan,
(Lovely waist, taintless skin)
O mo ara mu, o mo oge shey,
(Dresses well, very fashionable)
Bo fe wura mo ma fun e,
(If you want gold I’ll give you)
Fadaka kere ninu ohun ti mo ma bun e,(silver is little amongst what I’ll bestow you)
Ife re n kan mi lo mi inu
(Your love is at the center of my heart)
Orekelewa ni mo ma ba lo.
(It’s Orekelewa I’ll go with)
I’ve read about it, I’ve listened to people sing songs describing it, I’ve scolded friends about it,jilted one or two hearts that have felt it for me but for the first time in my life I am not ashamed to proclaim it…I am drunk in love and I would sing it to the end of the earth. I smile to myself every time I just remember her and to think that not one moment passes without thoughts of this heaven-sent angel crossing my heart. This isn’t just chemistry, its biology and physics combined and she’s the subject matter!!!
I’ve never had a dream girl, they are all the same to me but ‘Lewa came along and I just knew it. I guess its true what they say about you ‘just knowing it when love comes knocking at the door’, I’m convinced in my spirit that she’s the one. My mumu button has not only been pressed, she’s placed Mouka foam on it on a permanent basis. There’s just one challenge, I don’t know how to break it to her.
Now I know you’re wondering at this instance how this guy who points and kills babes at will can have trouble when it comes to the girl of his dream but trust me it’s an uphill task. I’ve thought about every way to go about it and I’ve drawn blanks. I’m convinced the feeling is mutual, my several litmus tests have yielded positive results (or so I think) yet I hold back every time an opportunity presents itself. I’ll have to call Tayo to the rescue, he’ll probably laugh at me but I’m not bothered, not even my ego is anywhere close to ‘Lewa (trust me, I’ve got a lanky ego).
After a lengthy discussion with Tayo and thoughtful considerations, I decided to take the bull by the horn. I called ‘Lewa to tell her I had something important to share with her and I remember how much she begged and tried to force out what I had in mind. My simple response was “Let’s meet under the tree where I christened you ‘Lewa 8 p.m tomorrow” and she agreed.
I had it all planned out in my head, I will let the words flow from the depth of my heart, it shouldn’t be difficult to explain how you feel to someone if you really feel something, right?
I left work early enough the next day; the peak period was gradually coming to an end so there was no need for me to work late. I dashed home to have a shower and dressed semi formally, my Zara shirt fitting perfectly. You don’t want a babe losing interest on the day you ask her out for the singular reason that you aren’t properly dressed. Talk about tying all loose ends!
I got to the front of the library at 7:45pm but stayed inside my car, the earliest ‘Lewa would get here is 8:30pm anyway so I used that opportunity to go over the lines I’ve prepared in my head. I decided to listen to some music to calm my nerves and Beat FM didn’t disappoint, DJ Caise was on the mix and was playing Mystro ft Chidinma – One kind love, just the exact kind of song I needed at that moment.
As expected, it was getting dark and my heart started beating really fast. Only a teenage boy will fidget when he’s about to ‘toast’ a babe, I thought to myself and that reminded me of the first girl I ever asked out. I was 16 or 17 at the time, and there was this babe I cared about in my class. I was attending extra mural lessons after school because my parents wanted me to try the private O’ Levels while transforming from the penultimate to the final class in high school (yeah, I’m smart like that *pops collar*).
We both resumed at the learning centre on the same day and so were paired together on the same desk and bench. I barely said a word to her on the first day but after a while I summoned courage and we got talking. She was the most beautiful girl I had ever seen in my life and my friends would tease me at every opportunity and call the girl my ‘wife’. I would fantasize about how we will get married and have beautiful kids and will get angry when I see her getting too close to another guy, talk about a 16-year-old getting jealous. It was easy for her to like me because she didn’t have to worry about her homework and tests, I was sure to come through.
Just like the way I am feeling now, I decided I had to make my intentions known before a senior tempts her and takes my ‘trophy’ away. I wrote a (love) letter to her after several consultations with Oxford dictionary and Songs of Solomon. I placed the letter in her bag just as we closed for the day and ran home, I knew my fate would be decided the next day. I got to the tuition center early the next day, and I just had a feeling everything would work in my favor.
She was unusually late and just as I was about getting worried, she walked in and my heart did a double beat. There was something different about her that fateful day. I did not have to wait for too long because I immediately saw a teacher walk in after her and she pointed at me. At that point I knew I was in for it. I got called to the Admin office and I saw two people who I later found out to be the girl’s parents staring at me like they wanted to rip my eyeballs out of their sockets. I’m sure you can imagine how the scene played out. It was not the 12 strokes of cane that landed on my buttocks that got to me, my letter was read in front of the whole class and I was the poster boy for the wrong reason.
That was the last day I saw Tobi (that was the girl’s name) as she was withdrawn from the lesson immediately. I still do not know how her parents got to find out about the letter but that experience among others made me decide not to let down my guard with daughters of Eve…but there’s been an exception to that rule lately.
At exactly 8:00pm, a familiar figure walked towards the tree, hips swaying from side to side, there was no way I wouldn’t recognize her. I said a last word of prayer as I stepped out of my car and walked up to her. “This is a first, you’re not 30 minutes late”, I said with a look of surprise written on my face as I walked to meet her.
“There’s no way on earth I could have gotten here late, not with the suspense you’ve kept me in since yesterday”, she replied as we met and we shared a brief hug. I insisted we sit under the tree and we got talking. We were about 30 minutes into the conversation when she cut me short and asked “What exactly is it that you want to tell me, I’m sure we didn’t come here to gist about how each other’s day went”.
And that was how it started. I told her about my life before we met, how I could get any girl because I thought they were all the same. I told her tales of sisters that have fallen at the battleground under my spear, best friends that became bitter enemies when they found out they’ve been exchanging stories about the ‘same man’, I was Julius Ceaser and I conquered every battle I fought in. Then I told her how she came into my life and everything changed.
“I’ve asked myself what you’ve done differently, what strikes me about you, what stands you out and I’m at a total loss. I wonder if it’s the beauty you radiate, it has to be something more because I’ve met pretty ladies, or maybe it’s the intelligence you exude, I’ve been with smart girls and turned them bad. Is it the good heart that you have or the fact that you are not tossed about by every wind? Is it the fact that you are so young yet so sure of what you want? Is it your smile (smiles), the one that brings smiles to my face whenever I think about it, an antidote to my bad days because when I remember it all my worries are gone?”
If there has ever been a time that I poured out my heart to a girl, it had to be that night, I spoke for one hour not stopping for one minute to catch my breath and all I was saying was how much she meant to me, time and space will not permit me to write all that I told this angel in human form.
I concluded by telling her ‘Lewa, I can’t promise you this will be all rosy. There will be days when you won’t be sure if you should go on because of what you’ll hear people say, what you’ll hear even my own friends say. There will be days when I’ll be the ‘guy that I am’, whatever that means, there will be days when we will fight, when you won’t pick my calls because you’re mad at me. There will be days when I’ll be so soaked in work that I won’t call you and will tell you how sorry I am in a text and yet the next day I still won’t call and I’ll get frustrated because you don’t seem to understand. In those trying times that are sure to plague every relationship, always remember the most important thing – Loving you comes easy to me. I’m not making an effort to love you…I just Love you!!!
When I finished speaking, I knew virtue had gone out of me, my hands and legs were shaking and it was visible.
‘Lewa looked at me, held my hands and smiled…and for the first time in one hour, she spoke four words…
….and everywhere went dark.
Something was buzzing beside me and the noise was getting really close. I opened my eyes and realized it was the alarm on my phone. I picked the phone in disgust to ‘kill’ the alarm and that was when I saw a twitter notification on my phone.
‘I guess you slept off, you never told me your name though. Can I call you Mr. Twitter?’
I was confused…“wetin dey happen nah?”, I thought. Then reality set in. I couldn’t sleep last night and in the process of passing time on twitter, I met someone.
We exchanged direct messages…and I slept off
…her handle @*****lewa
A tear rolled down my face….I had been dreaming.